Part of protecting my peace, and bringing back into focus the Do No Harm But Take No Shit, is remembering that the “Do no harm” also includes to myself.
I have kept mostly quiet about the bullshit that was dropped into my lap, uninvited, in August 2020. Even as I installed extra security on my home, as I talked to legal folks about what I could do.
Why? Because I’ve been stalked before. I’ve lived in that terror where you don’t know what these very clearly unstable people will do.
I have endeavored hard to take the high road. Not because it makes me a better person but because I had still been dealing with a lot of internalized bullshit regarding abusive behavior from toxic people.
But, it turned out, that in this case, it was doing me more harm than good. This person is blocked from my socials. They must go looking to see anything I say, and people talked about their refusal to stop stalking, move on, and get some legit form of mental health help. A lot of them, and on condition of anonymity because they don’t want to deal with this whole ass toxic mess who has been making it her whole purpose to stalk and harass me (and my friends).
When even your therapist is saying that sometimes you need to take off the gloves and put everything in the sunlight to disinfect, it’s something.
Despite the chaos around me, I’ve never given up on trying to keep my personal peace. I’ve stayed silent before to keep the peace for others, not myself. And I found myself wondering why the fuck am I doing this for people who are hell bent on destroying me… to not rock a proverbial boat? To not cause an uproar?
I am done. The gloves are off, and I am taking no more shit from anyone.